#87: Where the weak are killed and eaten
Shitney Beers; Gene Wilder’s Vacation; Belushi Speed Ball; Meryl Streek; Darlin’ Brando; Jane Fonda Fan Club; Transy Warhol; Winona Fighter
Shitney Beers
Some artists just have it. Star power? No. Raw charisma? No. An irresistible mix of danger and sexiness? No, stop guessing. I’m talking Bandcamp bio skills. “It’s not that great but neither am I. Cheers,” goes the one for Shitney Beers. Chef’s kiss.
The page has been inactive since 2020, though Shitney Beers has steadily released music, like a 2022 full-length called This is Pop and a three-song EP last December called SURPRISE. I wish I could say more, but all of Beers’ interviews are in their native German and often on podcasts. From the smattering of things I could translate online, and I can tell you: 1) The name is not ironic, as the now-sober Beers said, “That was the problem: I was always thirsty for beer: morning, afternoon, evening,” and 2) the UK-based drag queen who goes by Shitney Beers is an entirely different person. When they cross paths on the continent at some point, I hope they send pics.
Gene Wilder’s Vacation
The name is Gene Wilder’s Vacation. They play “experimental alt pop.” Their discography includes two songs featuring “irrepressible actor/comedian” Andy Dick.
They’re friends with a “savage wonk” dubstep artist named Dubloadz. In late March, they tried to track down a real giraffe for an upcoming music video. They recently worked on “a manifesto about the religion of pineapple worship.” I don’t feel capable of unpacking all of this, y’all.
Belushi Speed Ball
You may consider this name tasteless, but there’s a proud tradition of names referencing celebrity deaths in the world of underground music. (At the top is undoubtedly the Dead Kennedys, a name that’s been around for so long it barely registers anymore.)
But… does anyone under 40 know John Belushi? Or that he died at 33 from an overdose of heroin and cocaine, a.k.a. a speedball? Does anyone under 40 even know Jim Belushi, John’s non-union Mexican equivalent? Maybe “Farley Speed Ball” would resonate slightly more with a younger generation, as Belushi acolyte Chris Farley also died at 33 from a speedball (this time cocaine and morphine).
Yet in an interview with Louisville Public Media, the Kentucky thrash band had the audacity to claim “their name has nothing to do with the fatal overdose of actor John Belushi.” In another interview, singer Vinny Castellano said they’re “named after Jim [Belushi] and his love for [the video game] Sonic Spinball.” They elaborate in a TV interview:
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Another in something called Metal Mofos seems to go into it as well, at least according to the Google preview text, but if you click the link, the page has been suspended. WHO’S COVERING THIS UP?!
Belushi Speed Ball’s bald-faced lies probably have something to do with their day jobs in high school education, but everyone at the schools knows about their teachers’ band. Says bassist Jazzy Romans:
“While I’m playing they’ll be like ‘Ms. Romans!’ and wave at me, but at school they don’t ever talk to me about it. Even though I know a ton of them talk about it, because the other teachers tell me.”
So who does denying the origin of Belushi Speed Ball’s name protect? The band? I’m guessing they find it embarrassing and never intended to get so much attention. I’ve found multiple interviews with them, and their highly theatrical and silly shows—like GWAR meets the Blue Man Group—sound really fun. One write-up even noted that band members stay at the venue after shows to clean up their mess.
Belushi Speed Ball started as a studio project for Castellano, but after releasing an album in 2014, they started performing live. It’s a lot easier to have a tasteless name referencing an infamous celebrity death when you aren’t out and about. Ten years later, Castellano says stuff like, “Our music is very G-rated. We don’t swear. I like to think that for the most part we’re positive role models in the scene.”
But their smart-alecky sense of humor shows up in everything, particularly in song titles like “My Favorite Color is Pizza,” “We aren’t Thrashers, We are Hipster Posers,” “I Know How You Kids Like It Sloppy” (though technically it’s “like ’em sloppy”), “Saxual Tie-Ran-O-Sar,” “Are You Feeling It Now Mr. Krabs,” and so on.
And the whimsy they bring to their live shows carries over into how they release their music. Belushi Speed Ball’s latest, What, Us Worry? (oh yeah these guys read MAD) came out on cassette tapes formatted specifically for Teddy Ruxpin dolls (or “Thrashy Punxpin”). Previously they released music on 8-track tapes, Sega CDs, and cartridges for the Gameboy Advance and Nintendo 64, which Castellano custom made.
Man, I wish these guys had been my high school teachers. Three from my hoity-toity private school ended up in prison for child porn, defrocked for sexual abuse, or fired for groping a student! I would’ve killed for a thrash-metal teacher, and I would’ve celebrated the stupid glibness of his band’s name.
Meryl Streek
Related to above: The notes for 796 by Irish “avant garde punk producer” Meryl Streek describe the album as “a devastating condemnation of the shameful Catholic church abuse scandal in Ireland.” Among the songs are “False Apologies,” “Demon,” “No Justice,” and “Suicide.” Sound heavy? That’s nothing. The title “796” references the number of children buried in a mass grave in Tuam, Ireland, between 1925-1961. They were born while their mothers stayed at one of Ireland’s notorious homes for unwed women. The story gets even darker, if you can believe it.
So how about some “Meryl Streep-related band name” laughs? Please check out this clip from the 1986 Tom Hanks/Shelley Long comedy The Money Pit, while I sit until I no longer want to burn down a church like I’m in a Scandinavian black metal band.
Darlin’ Brando
Brandon Goldstein of Los Angeles cut his country teeth playing with Merle Jagger, a name that conjures a twangy alternate-dimension version of Marilyn Manson. Merle Jagger on vocals. Johnny Townshend on guitar. Waylon Bonham on drums. Willie McCartney on bass. Seriously, everybody, let’s make this happen.
Goldstein nailed his own moniker. “Darlin’”—the n’ is critical—suggests country without being on the nose. “Brando” is not only an acceptable nickname for Brandon, but perfectly snaps in with “Darlin’” to reference a Hollywood icon. The music is solid. As a bonus, Goldstein kinda looks like the great comedian Kurt Braunohler. A+ work all around, everybody.
Jane Fonda Fan Club
Actor, activist, and exercise enthusiast Jane Fonda turns 86 this year, so it’s surprising the relative youngsters in this self-described Brooklyn “indie jam band” are apparently into her. Maybe they’re big Grace and Frankie fans? The band doesn’t explain their choice anywhere, but 50 years later, other people are still pissed at “Hanoi Jane.” One of the top links Google returned took me to the forum for a muscle-car website called yellowbullet.com (“where the weak are killed and eaten”), and the most charitable comment about her was, “She is scum and does not deserve her lot in life.” I’m guessing those guys weren’t at Jane Fonda Fan Club’s show at Arlene’s Grocery on April 4th. Too busy killing and eating the weak, probably.
Transy Warhol
For all of the branding about maintaining its weirdness, Austin has been the seat of power in Texas for 178 years. The capitol building and its phallic flooring are only .7 miles away from where you’re puking on Sixth Street in front of the Mooseknuckle Pub. The government is seemingly powered by grievance politics, stewarded by a cadre of corrupt hypocrites and a guy who’s like a MAGA FDR.
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But hey, if you’re a transgender/non-binary band, Austin is better than most places in Texas. And if you’re a trans art-rock band, Transy Warhol is probably the best name out there. Last year the group released their debut full-length, Control, then… disappeared? This Rolling Stone story quoting member Adri Hullet describes Transy Warhol as her “former” band. Maybe she’s just not in Transy anymore, but the band’s Instagram and website are gone too.
Maybe they just blew too many minds. Not everyone can handle an ode to “boy pussy” like “Boy Toy”:
My guy’s a dyke but he’s not a man
And I am still a lesbian
My guy’s got tiddies but not for long
He’ll have them off come next fall
Winona Fighter
Let’s go back to April 6, 2020, and the very first issue of Band Name Bureau, and the very first band I wrote about, Winona Forever. That was the tattoo Johnny Depp got back when he was dating Winona Ryder, which he subsequently covered up to say “Wino Forever.” What mirth! What a cool guy! Winona Fighter’s “I’M IN THE MARKET TO PLEASE NO ONE” feels thematically appropriate here, as it’s about a toxic relationship: “I don’t like to think you’re having fun / I hope you suffer / And boys like you should rot for what they’ve done / Don’t blame your mother.”
The Nashville band is all pop-punk polemics, which carries over to social media, where singer Coco Luther has a habit of stirring shit up.
As an aside, it seems Winona Ryder has a disproportionate number of bands named after her. There was the East Bay punk band the Wynona Riders (formed in 1988, when she was only 17!), a Brazilian band called Winona Riders, another called Winona Driver (and Winona Dryver), Winona and the Riders, Free Winona…the list goes on. It’s weird, because live people usually ignore the strange and unusual.
POST-SCRIPTS
This edition came out late, apologies. At least it’s long? I had an, uh, unexpected change in my employment status, so the past few weeks have been dominated by big life decisions and anxiety. Some pretty major changes are afoot, but hopefully they won’t affect this newsletter much.
Readers may recall VR Sex from BNB #50 and their nearly lethal, yet inadvertently comical, pretentiousness. The press materials for their last album set a high-water mark for highfalutin horseshit, so things could only go downhill for VR Sex’s new album, Hard Copy. They come close, though:
Lyrically, the record revisits the project’s perennial fascinations: twisted lust, cheap thrills, dirty money, doomed delinquents, and ruined romance amid the creeps and cracked dreamers of gritty city voids. The title refers to the uncanny valley between “facsimile and the real thing, and the illusion that one is better than the other – when both come with their own menu of delights and demonic pleasures.”
There’s little information out there about Gene Wilder’s Vacation, including the name of the group’s sole member. I asked Perplexity if it had any info, and it threw shade: “The search results do not contain any information about a band called ‘Gene Wilder’s Vacation’. The results only mention ‘Gene Wilder's Vacation’ in the context of a list of artists, but provide no details about the members of this supposed band. Without any relevant information in the provided search results, I cannot determine who the members of ‘Gene Wilder's Vacation’ are, as this appears to be a fictional band name rather than a real musical group.” Savage!
My old A.V. Club colleague Nathan Rabin once wrote there comes a time in every film critic’s life when they realize that Oliver Stone is full of shit. I’d add it’s the same for every punk with Jello Biafra. I interviewed him once, and by “interviewed,” I mean, “said hi then listened as he monologued for an interminable 20 minutes.”